Thanks a million for this observation! I was at dinner with a subordinate two weeks ago, and the guy never stopped instant messaging and checking his Blackberry. It was the most disconcerting and disrespectful behavior I’ve ever seen. I’m sure whoever he was communicating with wasn’t a work associate, and so knowing that I (who pays his salary thank you very much) rated a distant second was downright rude! We really need to find a way to actually engage with one another again. I love your blog and read it nearly every day. Does that make me one of them?

On most flights I’d prefer that the person in the adjoining seat is silent. Most of the time they’re excruciatingly boring and I don’t really get into small talk about the weather.

Interacting with others, striking up conversations with strangers – truly a noble ideal. Problem is, you’re never entirely sure whether the person trying to engage you in conversation (or you’re trying to speak to) will see this as an opportunity to start talking to you and never shut up.

We’ve all been there, trapped in a flight / train / waiting room, unable to politely extricate ourself from the clutches of a monopolistic conversationalist.

No wonder we prefer to interact with persons and devices over which we have at least a modicum of control. While I don’t know what sort of oddities will come tumbling out of the mouth of the person sitting next to me on the plane, I’m reasonably certain that I’ll enjoy speaking with my friend or spouse on my cell.

In a world full of peril and uncertainty, people will seek security and control wherever they can find it. That’s not to say it’s right, but that’s the way it is.

You hit the nail on the head! You’re right – everyone seems to be in a different zone. In my working days I would see co-workers (& myself included, I guess) go into panic mode when they entered a “no-service” area and all wireless devices went “dead”. I hope cell phones are nevered allowed to be turned on in airplanes!

I read a science fiction book for a college course many years ago, the title and author of which escapes me. The gist of the plot was that people had become complete isolated from one another and lived alone in hermetically sealed spaces with outside contact being only thru electronic means. Once a decade or so, spouses would have to get together for the disgusting, but necessary task of procreating. When they were traveling to do so, they were alone in a windowless airplane where they wouldn’t be disturbed by the landscape passing underneath. I fear there could be a lot of truth to that “isolated from the world” scenario as we continue to devolve into our networked existence.

And then there’s the Eloi and the Morlocks…..

I agree with you. This is a real social problem. People are now all alone within their own little universes, oblivious to everything around them, and don’t really want to be interrupted by reality. We are becoming living, breathing avatars, existing only in our narrowly defined worlds.

Is Pogo also the one who said, “Everywhere I go, there I is”?

He is the latest incarnation of the T-1000 series (Terminator) cybernetic organism, sent back in time to locate and destroy John Connor.

I think The Who tried to make a musical out of this concept once, called “Lifehouse”. In it, the world was so polluted that everyone had to wear these suits with giant tubes that fed you, collected your waste, and kept you connected to a central source of information. The downside was you were completely disconnected from other human beings. Most of the songs from the shelved project ended up on “Who’s Next”. Sounds little like how we act today with so much to interface with besides humanity.

Wait a minute. Were you the guy sitting in 12B last week that didn’t shut up? Couldn’t you see I was working?

You are absolutely correct! Lately I have been commenting about this to my friends. We have become a nation of technology worshipers and have lost all form of genuine human interaction. It’s a shame, because we spend hours on these devices and yet can’t find time in the day for our kids and spouses. we need to recognize that the things that should be helping us with our productivity are making us waste valuable time that we should be spending with the people who are important in our lives.

Think Edward Hopper.

Well, Bing, nice thought, but I don’t give it much hope. Have you spent much time around kids that sit around like zombies flailing their thumbs at warp speed on those Game Boy machines? We’re training a whole generation to shut out interaction with what’s around them, whether it be fellow man or the natural world.

I watched as a schizophrenic homeless person down by San Diego harbor muttered to himself and shuffled aimlessly in small circles on the bike path. How could I communicate with him? His arms hung at his side and the look on his face was way past sad.It did not make me feel any better when he turned and I saw the blackberry in his ear. Probably CEO of a local mortgage company.

Amen, Brother Bing! Amen, I say!
(sent from my Blackberry)
(just kidding; made you groan, though, didn’t it?)

How can one so selfishly demand a “feel good” comment from someone they do not know nor understand. How do you know that this person could be dealing with a certain issue in his complex life whereby he is in constant thought and couldn’t be bothered with ridiculous things that are expected in society today. Why don’t you get a life and realize that people out there sometimes do not want to communicate with Blue personalities like yourself.

His designation is 3 of 10 Secondary Adjunct of Unimatrix 001.

Don’t let the guy with the Blackberry get to you. Probably wouldn’t have bothered you as much if he was reading a book. That, at least, is a familiar form of antisocial behavior which is easy to recognize as an expression of the desire for social isolation, or at least respite from conversation. We are aware that the reader does not want to be disturbed. In contrast, people now make themselves available for distraction from all kinds of devices. It is reasonable to assume that there is an available channel for human distractions, as well. When Grey Man ignored you, he was placing the importance of social interaction beneath that of technological distraction. This is out of order with prevailing social norms and was perceived as unreasonable. I would not worry so much about the distance our minds can take us from our bodies. This, in my estimation, is an admirable trait in humanity. It’s the choice not to disengage that marks the man. Would we be so offended if it were a book instead of a Blackberry?

John Denver, sounds like you need to get some sunshine on your shoulders, put away your electronics, get happy and begin to interact with other people.

It’s the technology. It’s the lack of social graces. I see more people today who don’t know how to interact. I even work with a guy that doesn’t interact with those that are not on his list of things to do. If you manage to get a response, you get a look from him that looks like he’s thinking, “why are you bothering me?”

And the excuses I hear from his subordinates usually refer to his intensity at the problem of the moment. I prefer to call it rude behavior. Perhaps, we need to send them back to mom for more lessons in social interaction.

I just want to add, if there’s any doubt, that I really do not and will not ever want to engage in a transcontinental conversation with anybody. I like silence. There was just something so odd about the whole experience. And Arthur has a great point. If my gray friend had been reading a book? No problemo. So go figure. Thanks as always, you all, for your thoughts. Even the guys who call me a jerkoff and tell me I have no life. How about that?

Why engage in human interactions of any kind when you can keep on the crackberry?

I think it’s using a “dry” crackberry , and the possible addiction that indicates that is so troubling. I’m picturing the homeless guy trying to get the last drops out of the bottle..

Arthur, I still respond when someone talks to me if I’m reading a book….
But that’s just me

My issue these days is catching a crowded train – when I bump someone as I sit down I will look them in the eye, smile and excuse myself. No response because 90% are listening to their ipod and zoned out. Turn those things off people and talk to each other!

I commute by public transportation every day, and I reserve the right to completely tune out my fellow passengers. Frankly, my time and energy are far better spent on my book, my music, or my crossword puzzle. I usually sit next to someone who’s already tuned out, and I know this person will probably not even bump my knees, let alone try to talk to me, try to flirt with me, have a loud cellphone conversation, try out their favorite running commentary of the day, or anything else.

In the immortal words of the TV show Dead Like Me (RIP) : “Anybody who ever said ‘love thy neighbor’ never had to take the bus.”

Hi Stanley, had similar experience on flight from Dubai to London except in my case I was treated to all the emotions that your bloke didn’t seem to share. Before we had even received complimentary drinks, we heard the roars of good news I assume, followed by hmmmm, wonder what was next, it came just as we left the tarmac, it was “oh b**ger”, when I looked at him he didn’t even muster up an apology or some flippant British comment, instead he met my gaze then looked straight back down. So on we go, through the turmoil of mutterings of oh I know better, all the way through to pain. The good point came for me when as I was getting ready to prepare to stand up he practically pushed past me, being never the quiet one, I asked him if he had left his manners in Dubai to which he was amazed and said “sorry boy I didn’t see you”. The only possible sweet & sour of such a story would be that as I picked up my baggage he was still standing hovering over his blackberry oblivious to the world passing, so there maybe an advantage to these anti-social devices after all!!!
p.s. the world goes on when you are in the sky, sleeping and driving so please don’t try to alter it, business was here before you and will be here when you’re long gone, enjoy the journey and look around, the girl / boy of your dreams or a perfect network opportunity may just pass you by otherwise

I’m 32 so I guess I’m supposed to be knee-deep in the blackberries and laptops and whatnot, but I hate it. I hate sitting in a meeting and watching more than half of the room checking their blackberries as somebody is speaking. And then later there’s always a great debate about why wasn’t something done, why did something get messed up…blah, blah… It’s because nobody is paying any attention.

There are times when I have said something in meetings that either made no sense or was actually a slam on the client and there wasn’t even a raised eyebrow.

I’m thinking about dancing the funky chicken next time.

So I say, just put down the blackberry and walk away. Let your mind wander on those flights. Nobody’s watching you. Nobody’s timing you. Just be there. Have a drink. Eat a snack. In meetings, if you’re bored, go the old-fashioned route and doodle.

We’re all going to die someday. I’d rather go thinking about the man I spoke to on the plane than the email I discarded later.

Prior to creating analogies between autism and device-addiction again, I think it would be wise of you to consider the fact that there are actual autistic people who may read this blog and find offense at your characterization of the disorder. I realize you probably meant no offense to a population numbering in the tens of thousands, but please take a moment to consider the point that your choice of words in this case show a complete ignorance of autism and a total lack of regard for autistic people.

Thanks for your comment, Steve. I understand what you are saying. And I mean no offense. I did think about the analogy for a while before I employed it, because I think it’s actually quite a precise one, and not a joke. People who suffer from autism have a certain phalanx of serious problems that affect their ability to relate as others do to the world outside them that I think are also displayed by late-stage BlackBerry addicts. They are often highly intelligent. They are capable of focusing very intently on a task at hand. They often have problems being touched and are perceived to be impolite or inappropriate in social settings. They may also be very highly functioning at their chosen profession. All these things add up to a useful if non-scientific diagnosis of self-induced autism of some kind. The fact that extreme dependence on the BlackBerry is a disability is a concept worthy of exploration, and this is the way I’ve chosen to go about it, with, I hope, proper respect for all concerned.

I understand where you are going with the analogy, and a few years ago I may have unwittingly done the same. Now, however, I am the father of an autistic boy. I have developed strong relationships with numerous autistic adults who have provided me with a much deeper understanding of the experience of being autistic. And I maintain my original point that, though unintentional, you have made some offensive remarks. In describing “Blackberry Autism”, you refer to his non-responsiveness, the fact that he does not smile, the fact that he does not talk. These are all characterizations that reinforce negative stereotypes, and do not promote an appropriate understanding of autism. This sort of characterization instead promotes the view of autistic people “trapped in their shell”, or “in their own world”, which is not at all accurate. Though scientific understanding of autism has progressed, and many autistic people have written and spoken on issues such as this. Common knowledge, unfortunately, has not yet caught up.
As I have said, I am sure you meant no offense. I only ask that you consider the impact of your words on autistic folks, and consider refraining from using the term “Blackberry Autism” in the future.
Though I do not have quite the audience you do, I would be happy to provide you a link to a blog entry I did on this. You might even see a few autistic commenters (2 have commented so far) as quite a few of them frequent my blog. I will only post the link with your permission. You might find it interesting…

Yes, Steve, by all means do post a comment with the link to your blog. And thanks for your thoughts.

Stanley –
I appreciate your consideration on this issue.
I have updated my original entry to offer some recommended reading to anyone who may follow the link.

http://onedadsopinion.blogspot.com/2007/09/simple-im-sorry-will-suffice.html

My previous comment has not yet posted, so I am wondering if it is lost in the ether. If so, here is the link:
http://onedadsopinion.blogspot.com/2007/09/simple-im-sorry-will-suffice.html

If the other comment is simply awaiting moderation and will eventually post, please then moderate this one out.
Thanks.

I am guessing the vast majority of autistic individuals who have been properly diagnosed as such aren’t

a) reading this blog
b) caring what other people think – after all, autistics don’t see other people as PERSONS
c) caring what BING thinks
d) caring what Steve, father of the autistic child, thinks

The disorder is such that the majority of the above is impossible to those, again, correctly diagnosed as autistic.

Take it to the bank.

He is an alien.

Interesting to see the results of 60-100 hours of TV babysitting the children for 10-20 years turns out.
TV’s don’t have to interact, you just get entertained in 30 second bites–
no long term synapses necessary to read anything that might make you think, or learn to sit still and interact in school or in community.
Ann Rand was right.
MS, Santa Cruz CA

Could of, should of written this. Love and miss Walt Kelly as remembering him only thru a child’s eyes and seek similar beacon’s of wisdom.

Congradulations! Posting my comments yesterday, you have passed my standard operating procedure for initial interactions test, and thus are screened to move forward to deeper profound/revealing levels? My contract work ( with T H E largest consumer goods producer) generating/strengthening innovations, meets m a n y ’self-induced autistic’ momments-of-truth. Are too many of ‘my posted innovations’ left ‘orphaned’ because of the very pervasive behaviors that reach far beyond these plane rides? Duh! My cartooned ‘innovation monster’ shows this one-eyed creature statiated with a car bulging in its belly as it posts its newly-ideated stone wheel! This ’self-induced autistism’ is aware of what surrounds them, but fears its recognition threatens their personal ‘idea territory’ loss. Be their ’stealth’ idea-adoption as my only hope? Like, way yes!
As their very singular o u t s i d e source, my vent of this was impossible, before my searching for ’self-induced autistism’ produced your blog!

Let m e take over for 12A:
Now let’s all cut to the plane ‘idle-chat-chase’!

1st, Dr. Phil Mcgraw is nobody to advice-dispense, TV-wise; what other man is forced to take his wife to work every day, like he might somehow s t ra y without her lazer-like unblinking daily glare? And 2nd, has anyone not seen Oprah’s rag, logo-titled, as the total “zero” it is? Her credentials:
A. Took Roger Ebert’s $ advice to syndicate.
B. Was in the right place, at the right time, way back in afirmative action heyday.
3rd, making the first soap that floats gives a free pass to multi-billions successes to future useless mediocrities?

Just wondering . . .

Aggree with Roland 100%, only the idea monster is not that but a merciful angel!

Roland should do a cartoon of the himself and send it in.

A “brainiac pro-crank” like youself could have likely needed their ‘colors’ done for them with a little wardrobe makeover thrown in to chase it all down, and we could have explored that, if 12A were myself at that time. A hoot for all, yeah!.
What is with that bogusly lame 2007 Christmas TV spot by Macy’s? The one with all the celeb bad acting? Shean John in that way way bad off-white femmelike adirondack sweater? The Donald takes one acting step backward in a miserably failed attempt to break out from his standard ‘glare into cam’ comfort zone.

You neede played in a major way. Everyone at my places of work are my bosses. Those being the ground rules with contract work. Kudos for 12a for not plying into lure to control his flight! The big payoff for me is anytime a 12B wants 12A more than 12B wants 12A and thus am given the ‘ultimate’ ; to play with them! A plan reserved for unwanted cleints most times. You know, push them to agreeing to more and more extravagant perks only to kill the deal in the end. All for no special or flimsy reason. So close to having me and all they have to show for it is their drool. You know those family emergencies do happen . . . Sorry what were we discussing again?

Lets talk about what is really bothering all of us. Those decline of bee populations. Is this another lesson they will teach us? Sure. All the members with their assigned jobs doing their assigned jobs or they are of no use to the societal good. No refuge in old age or sick days. The health and progress of their corporal/physical life/housing. No art ,no life blood of a higher sociological culture. In human society with its levels of sustaining nurture to the non-contributing members, developing and moving to more and more efficient systems of elinimation or outright removal of those compassionate levels.
Case in point is the crushing power of the papaazzi to locate and trounch falling stars self destructive decline. Ah , what we taking about again?

You people are all failing to repay for these wonderful ‘performers’ by contributing in kind with similar little sketches of life-entertainment. Would it hurt you any to fill sanother’s empty day with a memory worhty, better thaqn TV ‘gem’? So get yourselves juiced, creatively, and start returning a fraction of this free and completely unforgettable entertainment!!!!

Can someone please inform their local airports that luggage carts should be free, they are all over the world airports. Especially after all these “airport security taxes” Security at the airpot is not any better it is just slower, so they get us to think it is better.

This in hopes of everyone finally calling out the overdue reality check for our poor Dr. Fill. Exactly what helpless wuss permits his wife to follow him everyday to work to then spy his every moment there and even escort him off? This poor fellow does indeed need to face his own reality check from the same child that revealed for all those too long zoned out how very naked this TV phsyc emporer has been all along!–One Missy Psychyppie, Two Missy Psychyppie, all together now . . .
Oprah’s best man-bashing step in the deevolution of modern man is our dear Dr. Fill. Perfectly imperfect man. Sharing a popular male inability to select his own clothes, Dr. Fill surpasses other male inepts with his incapability for independent function outside the realm of his 24/7 wife’s eye. The control freaks who track spouses rigged cars with twigs and such need only to learn from this master so brazenly elevated to network status of her broadcast evidence as Dr. Fill’s daily resident audience member. No deeper mistrust can be had.

I couldn’t have said it better myself.

The truth of this matter is the only genuine people to be publically found will be the bag people at the grocers. The best of those being the mentally challenged ones and after those, the previously unemployed phd’s just grateful to have a paying job again. Try it out and then get back to me.