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BingToday Microsoft announced it would be launching a new search engine that will compete with Yahoo and Google in the vast hunt for search bucks. In an incredible act of branding sagacity, they announced that the name of the new search engine will be: Bing. 

In response to this, today I have issued the following news release:

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

BING VS. BING

LONG-TIME FORTUNE COLUMNIST AND BEST-SELLING AUTHOR STANLEY BING CONDEMNS “BRAND INTRUSION” BY NEW MICROSOFT SEARCH ENGINE, ALSO TO BE NAMED “BING”

OFFERS SERVICES TO NEW ENTITY FOR “ANY REASONABLE OFFER”

NEW YORK, MAY 28, 2009 – Stanley Bing, FORTUNE Magazine columnist and best-selling author, today expressed “moderate outrage” at the branding of the new search engine to be offered by Microsoft, also to be called Bing. At the same time, Bing the Author took the unusual step of offering an initial olive branch to Bing the Search Engine, proposing that the two powerful brands merge into one for which Mr. Bing could be the logo, corporate symbol and spokesman, to the extent that it fits in with his other duties. 

“This is an unprecedented case of brand intrusion by one of the most powerful and wealthy corporations in the world,” said Bing the Author, as opposed to Bing the Search Engine, which, unlike Mr. Bing himself, cannot be called for comment because it is not a person. “At the same time, I believe I can propose a solution to this problem that with work to the benefit of both Bings, me and the other one,” he added. 

Mr. Bing (the Author) issued these statements in reaction to the announcement, made today by Microsoft at the D: All Things Digital conference in Carlsbad, Calif, that the software giant is set to launch an $80 million to $100 million campaign for Bing, the search engine it hopes will help it grab a bigger slice of the online ad market. This huge campaign will be conducted by JWT, the massive advertising agency, and is viewed by many to be an attack on the market position of Google, long the search engine leader. Little notice has been taken to date, however, of the serious implications for Mr. Bing or, for that matter, any other Bings, which Mr. Bing made clear he doesn’t care about. 

“For nearly 25 years, I have jealously guarded the value of my brand,” Bing (the original) continued. “For several years, it was threatened by the enormous reputation of Rudolf Bing, the fictional presence of Chandler Bing and the high-profile persona of Stephen Bing. This, however, is the worst challenge the Bing Brand has faced to date, particularly in regards to my search engine optimization positioning.”

In conjunction with these statements, Mr. Bing has offered to open discussions with Bing the Search Engine and its representatives to iron out differences and challenges to each respective brand. “I think we’re a lot more powerful together than we are apart,” he added. “At least I’m pretty sure I am.” 

Bing (Stanley) indicated that the shape and specific nature of the merged branding opportunities have yet to be hammered out, but that he is available from the second week in June onward, for the most part, and would be willing to consider “any reasonable offer” for his services, or simply to provide no services, if that’s what seems best. 

Mr. Bing began his column in FORTUNE in 1995. Prior to that, he was at Esquire Magazine for 11 years, where he built a considerable following. He is also the author of numerous books and is the host of a popular Web destination on CNNMoney.com and writes regularly for Huffingtonpost.com. He has been cultivating the Bing brand since 1983. 

Microsoft was founded by Bill Gates and Paul Allen in 1975. It has been establishing the Bing brand for about seventeen minutes.

Contact:  Stanley Bing
                   bingblog@gmail.com 

I will only add that I absolutely no intention of initiating any form of legal action against Bing (the Search Engine) unless he/it feels it would be mutually beneficial for us to do so. And that I do look forward to being massively well-optimized on my new friend.




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After reading the initial tid-bits coming out about the new MS search engine, I wondered how long it would take to catch your attention. Though, one can only imagine it would be great for both brands. I know this will probably increase my likelihood of using the new search engine!

Posted By Mia – Charlotte, NC : May 28, 2009 12:43 pm

They probably got the idea from you. Let them pay a little something for it. A little more if they want the cigar-smoking silhouette, but either way it’s cha-ching!

Posted By Mike Jackson – Austin, Texas : May 28, 2009 12:58 pm

Would Bing (the Author) be willing to ditch his Macs, IPhones and IPods if he was offered a decent role in the marketing of Bing (the Search Engine)?

Posted By Marcel, Madrid : May 28, 2009 1:05 pm

Bing, just last night I”m on flight from Beantown to Atl and I red about the new search engine. My first thought that came over me was “how could they”?

Hopefully this blantant infringement upon your brand will be rectified? Maybe you could get a cameo in one of their soon to be onslaught of commercials?

Bing vs the Cool Apple guy? maybe you could TKO him for me? I want a cut if this makes into the mainstream…….

Maybe I should have pursued Madison Ave?

Posted By Yankee in the South, Atlanta, GA : May 28, 2009 1:10 pm

Funny he is not.

Posted By Yoda, roswell, nm : May 28, 2009 1:19 pm

“BING!”

Guess the classic movie this phrase comes from :)

Posted By Needle-nose Ned : May 28, 2009 1:21 pm

Bing,Bang,Bust. Looks like you should have spend a dime on a lawyer to register your service mark/ trade mark prior to the big boys in Redmond registering their trademark.
To help you along, a major part of trade mark and service mark infringement is confusion by the public based upon the “new” use of the same or similar mark.
I already am confused. By reading your columns it was my belief that you were omnipotent and all knowing master of the universe. Now it seems that you are just a writer.. what a shock and what a confusing thing to me.
Well, I hope the next time I google, yahoo or bing the word “Bing” it shows up as your website first. If not, I will be even more confused if I end up at Microsoft to read about financial news. Then again, they do have billions and billions of liquid assets they could tell me about…

Boy am I confused which Bing is Bing…..

Posted By Pete Thousand Oaks CA : May 28, 2009 1:48 pm

Hey Bing, let’s take this one step further. Merge STANLEY Tools, BING (the search engine), and BINGBLOG. Then appoint yourself as CEO in charge of imparting wisdom.

Looks like millions a year to me.

Posted By Jim, Winston-Salem, NC : May 28, 2009 2:08 pm

I just came over to see if you were gonna wet your beak, when I saw your most excellent press release.

Posted By Chris in Fort Myers, FL : May 28, 2009 2:15 pm

Pete– I AM BING!!

Posted By Bing : May 28, 2009 2:16 pm

In the immortal words of Paulie Walnuts: Ya gotta respect da Bing!”

Posted By Chris in Fort Myers, FL : May 28, 2009 2:20 pm

To: Needle-nose Ned at 1:21 pm:
“Bing” is of course from “Groundhog Day”.

Posted By Jake, Atlanta, GA : May 28, 2009 2:22 pm

Bing according to my Gypsy tea leaf reader, she sees conflict and cash in your future……..

Posted By Jack Hammond Canada : May 28, 2009 2:48 pm

You do of course realize that by offering that you “could be the logo, corporate symbol and spokesman” you are in effect stating that your Bing could be the bling for the new Bing?

Posted By Robert LMAO in Seattle : May 28, 2009 3:02 pm

Hmmm. Well you can also put your silhouette (w/non PC cigarette and holder) in the package.
Also tell the boys in Seattle to be careful selling the search engine in China as “BING” in mandarin means “disease”.

Posted By Joe Bonomo, Redding CT : May 28, 2009 3:18 pm

Frankly, you’re doing well by staying the f away from it. It’s going to be one more massive Microsoft fail.

Posted By Bada Bing Washington, DC : May 28, 2009 3:24 pm

In your list of Bings, you left out the most famous one of all–Bing Crosby!

Posted By Abby, Columbus, OH : May 28, 2009 3:30 pm

I understand they considered
“Bong” but with the Phelps stuff,
that was quickly torpedoed.

Well done, Stanley.

Posted By Paul, Miami, Fl. : May 28, 2009 3:39 pm

Right, like we’re supposed to believe you’ve been building the Bing brand for years but you didn’t buy the domain. c’mon, you’re not stupid. You sold it to MSFT and now you’re riding the buzz to build your brand. I can respect that. @robblewis

Posted By san francisco, ca : May 28, 2009 3:47 pm

I actually bought a bunch of stuff about Stanley Bing, but didn’t cover the entire Bing turf! Who would have thought that with all the brands in all the world, they would walk into mine?

Posted By Bing : May 28, 2009 3:49 pm

Would bada bing! be public domain?

Posted By Anonymous : May 28, 2009 4:19 pm

One of the great feature of bing is auto compete feature, which is similar to Google, though being a blogger I would like to see some quality result from
Bing rather then people who game SEO and come at the the top of Google Search result. Lets hope for something new and useful this time from Microsoft

Posted By Harsh Agrawal : May 28, 2009 4:45 pm

I’d like to take this opportunity to invite people who confuse me with the Microsoft Search engine to bring your comments and thoughts to this blog. They appropriated my name. If I can build traffic and add to my positioning by building confusion with their name, so much the better. So welcome Harsh Agrawal!

Posted By Bing : May 28, 2009 4:55 pm

They are now the “machine that goes….bing!”

(what movies is that from ??)

Posted By GA, SL UT : May 28, 2009 5:32 pm

Bing the search engine’s backronym: “But It’s Not Google.” What’s yours?

Posted By LL Col J, NY, NY : May 28, 2009 5:38 pm

Well played, Mr. Bing.

Posted By Mark Johnson, San Francisco, CA : May 28, 2009 5:46 pm

Gee, LL, I don’t know. Can any of you think of a decent acronym for me?

Posted By Bing : May 28, 2009 6:19 pm

But

I

Never

Google

Posted By Paul. Miami, Fl. : May 28, 2009 6:49 pm

I don’t think we should allow the G to stand for Google. How about Bing Is Now Gargantuan? Or Brand Intrusion Nearly Grotesque?

Posted By Bing : May 28, 2009 6:59 pm

Bing, your ship has come in, you gotta play in this game. How many of us in life get handed cards like this with the deep pocket at the table able to set you up for life just by calling with his pocket change?

Stand tough on this one – my God, man, it’s your good (pen) name they are treading upon !!!

Posted By Prefan, Camp Hill, PA : May 28, 2009 7:08 pm

Sorry, forgot my acronym for your consideration….

B usinessman
I nventing
N oteworthy
G iggles

Posted By Prefan, Camp Hill, PA : May 28, 2009 7:15 pm

Stanley,

Point well taken, oh gargantuan one.

Posted By Paul, Miami Florida : May 28, 2009 7:25 pm

This rings like a possible sting that may bring an antitrust ode to sing of the great Stanley Bing that’s instigated by Microsoftings search for new beginnings in digitalings.

Posted By Bob, Michigan : May 28, 2009 8:18 pm

Bing, this could be the end. All you need is to have your name become synonymous with Microsoft’s efforts at competing with the Ipod….the sad little Zune. Better press now for an early payout before their initial marketing euphoria evaporates (or Mr. Gates happens to wander out of retirement to ask ‘what the hell are you thinking’).

I suppose you could eventually sue for damages, but about the only thing Microsoft does really well is initiate counter-suits.

Posted By Mike, Spokane, WA : May 28, 2009 8:24 pm

Bing, another one for your consideration:

Boarish
Internet
Name
Grabbing

Posted By LL Col J NY, NY : May 28, 2009 8:33 pm

Ned? Ned Ryerson???

Posted By Mark, Mountain View, CA : May 28, 2009 9:33 pm

“Mr. Bing could be the logo, corporate symbol and spokesman, to the extent that it fits in with his other duties.”

AHAHAH and who is this again? This is almost as good as when Spike Lee tried to sue TNT when they switched to SPIKETV.

Posted By mark sebring fl : May 28, 2009 10:16 pm

Someone could sue BING (the Wit) for causing grevious bodily harm.
I snorted scaldingly hot coffee up my nose reading this!

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! *snort*

Posted By deviousDiv, SINGAPORE : May 28, 2009 10:57 pm

I was first.

Posted By Bing Crosby, Heaven : May 28, 2009 11:09 pm

blogging
idiot..oops, icon
named
gil

Posted By laurel, Santa Barbara CA : May 28, 2009 11:24 pm

Microsoft would have chosen ZING if ZUNE was a winner. Let’s hope they don’t soil your good name.

By the way, ‘BING’ in Cantonese means ice, so just be cool.

Posted By M. Ting, El Monte, CA : May 28, 2009 11:37 pm

Wait… I have a patent on the ABC alphabet! Change to some cryptic sings, or pay me a license fee!

Posted By Outside of the USA (yes, there are some other places in the world!) : May 29, 2009 3:46 am

Beautiful especially in todays litigeous times

Posted By New Zealand : May 29, 2009 4:12 am

Hi Stanley Bing!

My name is Mr. Bing Kimpo, and I’m commenting on this from Manila, the Philippines.

I share your shock – I just found out today that I am now a search engine.

I guess I should prepare for the new snappy-comeback. Out with “Bing… as in Crosby?” and in with “Bing… as in the search engine.”

Bing Kimpo

Posted By Bing Kimpo, Metro Manila, Philippines : May 29, 2009 7:42 am

Funny, but when I heard the Microsoft announcement I thought of this column. So I believe you have a solid case in their brand intrusion.

Posted By Another Jim, Worcester, MA : May 29, 2009 8:11 am

The Oregon cherry producers will surely have something to say about all this.

Posted By ChicagoSail, Chicago IL : May 29, 2009 9:35 am

No joke…on the main Yahoo News page there is a daily popular searches bar that lists several links of the day. Usually I ignore it but today, along with links to national spelling bee, susan boyle, jay leno, iran there it is a link to BING! My first reaction was you must have written a cool column/blog that got serious activity. That is how I found out about Bing the search engine.

Some trademark lawyer at MSFT dropped the ball on this one….

Posted By Barb in Hotlanta, GA : May 29, 2009 12:22 pm

Bing..u might not want to align your brand with microsoft…it will decimate your likeness…do you really want to associate yourself with a company that has a history of producing junk? Better to acquire microsoft, place people on the board who will vote down any association with your brand, break the company into 1000 little pieces, sell them off, then go retire in tahiti.
If you need money to buy microsoft, give me a call, i just started a hedge fund…i’m selling a new derivative, which i recently invented…it’s going to be the source of the next bubble…anyway, if you need the money, i should be over at dick cheney’s ranch while he’s out attacking all other president’s (current and before him)

Posted By Mahagwa, Los Angeles, CA : May 29, 2009 1:51 pm

Shouted in the style of Sapartacus at the coliseum: “I’m Bing-acus”.

Posted By Rick Bing, BC : May 29, 2009 1:56 pm

this won’t catch on. I can see myself “yahooing” and “googling” but not “binging”

Posted By macdisser,bronx,new york : May 29, 2009 6:57 pm

Bing has to be and is motivated by money, (advertising) otherwise we would have an OS, any OS that works without trashing legacy equipment that goes unsupported.
uSoft has to be opposite on the color wheel of green in this case.

Posted By Lee : May 29, 2009 11:33 pm

Bing sucks as a search engine name. Ping would be better. As in “I am pinging it now”. “I am binging it” just does not pass mustard gas! OUCH. Microstupid!

Posted By dan bloom, Chiayi, Taiwan : May 30, 2009 6:57 am

Okay relax more than one person can have the same name but when it comes to how we make our living well that S^&T is war.

Next we will will hear that Bing will want rights to the David Chase “Sopranos”… So let me be proactive in saying…”Forgeta bout it if you know what’s good for yah.” As for microsoft they have enough trouble with teh organized folks accross the pond called the EUU.

Posted By The underbelly of Bing, Danville NH : May 30, 2009 3:44 pm

fight back stanley bing. you have precedence on your side, http://www.nissan.com/

as for Mr Softie, they lost the search race to Google, the cool race to AAPL, the social frontier to facebook.

Stanley — you have their search engine in a vise. Just Squeeze

Posted By Alex Antoniou, Cincinnati, Ohio : May 31, 2009 7:51 am

bing, the stogie of yoous is indeed impressive. pall malls were my downfall. until ms decided on bing, sorry to say i was unaware of stanly bing. i did know of rudolf bing. used to work with chinese and they said bing meant good luck

Posted By bing, placerville, ca : May 31, 2009 8:42 pm

It seems, bing, that bing seems to mean several things in chinese, according to the comments here. Some of them good, some of them bad, for some reason.

Posted By Bing : June 1, 2009 12:38 am

Better MS search engine names, go!

BlueScreen.com
Bling.net
MSSearchForSure.us
ZuneMeHard.com

Posted By Bob, Wichita, KS : June 1, 2009 10:58 am

Can I simply suggest we rename you both:

you: Bing 1
MS: Bing 2

and, to quote the Cat in the Hat
“Thing 2 would like to clarify that just because he wears the number 2 does not imply in any way that he’s inferior to Thing 1.”

Posted By Perry, Denver CO : June 2, 2009 9:29 am

Mr Bing,
On behalf of those of us who are somewhat confused about the Bing (you), Bing (Live), Bing (Friends) and the general Bling thing, thank you.

I am still a little unsure, but rest assured that in my mind Bing is resoundingly associated with the sound of a bell at my local church.

Incidentally, I fight for the little guy, so you have my full blinging bing support for Mr Bing as opposed to the MS Bing thing.

Kindly yours,

Mr Bing advocate – Laura Bing-Callow (Ok fine, Laura Callow – the brand thingey has become ridonculous – law-suits everywhonk)

Posted By Laura Callow, Alberta, Canada : June 3, 2009 12:35 am

I wonder why Microsoft never followed up on the brilliant suggestion made by The Onion in its classic article: “Microsoft Patents Ones and Zeros.”

REDMOND, WA—In what CEO Bill Gates called “an unfortunate but necessary step to protect our intellectual property from theft and exploitation by competitors,” the Microsoft Corporation patented the numbers one and zero Monday.”

See the rest at
http://www.theonion.com/content/node/29130

Posted By Mandy Cat Centennial CO : June 5, 2009 12:02 pm

There’s one fundamental difference here. MS Bing doesn’t produce anything. They are merely “the search”. You, sir, are the RESULT.

Posted By Ken, Centreville, VA : June 5, 2009 5:25 pm

Mr. Bing, I must say that I totally agree with you on this one. I think you should cash in on this same name circumstance and hop in an ad of some sort for MS. Take advantage of being the it Bing!

Posted By Bonnie, Poughkeepsie, NY : June 11, 2009 5:14 pm

I do not have time to review all the 62 other comments in this stream so I will just go ahead in the knowledge that my opinion may have been voiced already.
Bing has been vaunted as a “decision engine”. The actual decision to be made is, however, only this – what to buy.
In connection with some research I was doing I entered the phrase “What industries are the largest users of stationery?”. Plenty of words there to get a grip on – or so you’d think. Instead Bing seizes upon one word “stationery” and delivers pages of local envelope and print cartridge vendors. To move ahead as a search engine Bing must be better than, or different to, that. Another Microsoft arrow that misses the target completely.

Posted By Chris, Rochester, Kent, UK : July 15, 2009 9:56 am

slowed my computer to a crawl. junk

Posted By Anonymous : July 18, 2009 10:26 am

What will Bing do about United Hero? Bing is getting all of the attention but United Hero is having an amazing response.

What do you think about a search engine that gives 50% of its proceeds to help people here in America?

Posted By Jay, Seattle Wa. : July 21, 2009 1:49 am

As a Website owner Bing is one of the best site’s i’ve ever searched! http://www.betterbusinesschoice.com is my site, and Bing has done wonders for my site!

Posted By Jacob! Carlsbad, CA : August 15, 2009 12:24 am

I tried “Bing” search engine for a month, but found its hype overinflated (like most claims from Microsoft). For me Bing didn’t produce results much different than Google, so I am going back to Google. Hope Mr. Bing can resolve his issues with Microsoft as easily as I have.

Posted By RhodZimm, West Hills, CA : October 5, 2009 1:30 pm

Have you mastered your executricks?
Are you enjoying the perks of executive life, while working only when absolutely essential? Take this quiz to find out if you're an accomplished trickster.
Stanley Bing
Stanley Bing is a Fortune columnist and best-selling author of business books noted for their wisdom as well as their sharp, slightly acrid sense of humor. He is also the only writer on business and the workplace who still puts on a suit and tie and goes to do battle with the dragons that breathe fire at corporate America every day. This blog captures what remains of his brain after it has exploded in all other directions.
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