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Thursday, October 29, 2009 at 1:40 pm
As you know, original speculation was that the pilots were taking their semi-approved staggered naps simultaneously. This made sense to me. Flying one of those big planes is almost as boring as running a business meeting. Once the thing is up in the air, you set the automatic controls, lean back and wait for it to be over. It’s my estimate that fully 63% of all business people have at one time or another copped a parcel of Z’s when the gears of the machine were grinding. Why shouldn’t pilots? Okay, I can think of a lot of reasons why not and I’m sure you can too. But the idea that these guys slept through their wake up alarm and allowed their enormous vehicle to drift over the landing zone didn’t seem far-fetched. Yesterday I heard that the somnolence theory has now been supplanted by the story that the two were cruising the web and lost track of the time. This summons up a couple of images to my mind. I’m thinking they weren’t just Googling. I’m willing to bet that if they were online, it was some kind of World of Warcraft thing. As good as YouTube or Wikipedia might be, you don’t lose yourself in it the way you do when a Orc is about to hammer in your brain pan and send you back sixteen levels. There they are, 37,000 feet up, a planeful of people behind them, whacking away at their joysticks in some digital dungeon? I can buy that. In the days I was addicted to DOOM, I used to spend the entire night blasting away at hideous monsters, so in the zone that I didn’t realize that the sun had risen until my wife came in to tell me it was time to go to work. So maybe that’s what they were doing when they were out of touch for 78 minutes. As an explanation, it still seems pretty lame to me. Maybe one was sleeping and the other was earning experience points as a Zarkon warrior or something like that. Anyway you slice it, though, it points to a breakdown in the system somewhere. Now it turns out it wasn’t just the snoozy (boozy?) gamer/pilot dudes who are in hot water. The air traffic controllers and the FAA, which is supposed to regulate such things, were egregiously late in notifying the military of the wayward Northwest flight to Minneapolis. The information that a flight has essentially gone out of the blue and into the black is supposed to be conveyed in about 10 minutes time. It took at least 40 minutes for the news to be conveyed upward to the guys who monitor our skies. Doesn’t generate a whole lot of confidence, does it? All of this is capped off by the news that the pilot’s union is unhappy with the fact that the FAA has revoked the licenses of the pilots in question and is now preparing a response. I’ll be interested to see it. At A southern International Airport, back in the 60s, an incident happened: Supposedly the pilot was preparing the flight engineer to become a pilot. The engineer was preparing to land, in doing so, he forgot to put the landing gear down. The crew on the third shift was mystified by the spark parade on the runway as the ship slid on its belly toward the terminal. The owner was quick to put wrapping paper suported with masking tape to cover the owner’s identity. Slowly the error of the airways trickled out to the airport personnel; then to the man on the street. I believe champagne flights were in vogue in those days. A WWII popular song went something like this: “Wait till you get them in the air boys, wait till you get them………..”. Posted By Bob, Michigan : October 29, 2009 2:31 pm
You know what’s even more interesting than WoW? Sex and gambling. Do Orcs gamble, are there bachelor parties in Second Life? Now that’s dangerous stuff. Posted By MW, Medford, MA : October 29, 2009 3:39 pm
I can’t get that image from “Airplane” out of my head, with the blow-up Otto pilot smoking a cigarette after having been re-inflated by Elaine. Posted By Steve, Charleston, WV : October 29, 2009 5:04 pm
Airplanes are so computarized that it’s OK if they snooze all journey and just command the ship during landing. Really we are safest that way. Posted By uk migration lawyers, LA, CA : October 29, 2009 5:05 pm
Zzzzzzzzzzzzzz… Posted By Sleeping Onthejob,Seattle,WA : October 29, 2009 7:00 pm
I bet they were trying to program their universal remotes: This would never happen if we still had open cockpits. Posted By Jake, Portland, Wet : October 29, 2009 7:19 pm
Damn, Bing! Was that a Neil Young reference? From the same album: Shelter me from my sleepin Think of me Doo Doo Doo Doo Do do do do. Live Rust! The best live set since Posted By Paul, Miami, Fl : October 29, 2009 7:36 pm
What’s next? Andre Agassi smokin crystal meth? Bing, say it ain’t so. Posted By Paul, Miami, Fl. : October 29, 2009 8:15 pm
Yeah it would probably be funny if I did not fly all the time. I do see them getting so caught up in their laptops that they lost track of time so much. I think like many others they were sleeping. I also see today the military was never informed, but what baffles me is how come air traffic control did not try to contract them during the 91 minutes they received no contact from the flight. Posted By Paul H Seattle WA : October 29, 2009 9:18 pm
FAA perpetually blames the victim, and NTSB covers for FAA. FAA is still the same “Tombstone Agency” decried by former USDOT Inspector General Mary Schiavo in her Congressional testimony years ago. Though presidential administrations changed within the last year, we now know that college drop-out J. Randall (Randy) Babbitt is as much of an abject aviation safety failure as his ignoble FAA Administrator predecessors Bobby Sturgell, Lynne Osmus, and Marion Blakey. There remains no meaningful regulation of aviation safety in this country – just an aero-mercantile puppet like Randy Babbitt acting at the behest of the airlines, ATA, and fat aero-contractors. Like a caddy. Like a Fendi. Like a submissive. Babbitt’s FAA “fines” airlines and then cuts the “fines” to pennies on the dollar in the same breath. In turn, Babbitt’s aeromerc masters will make certain that Babbitt and others in FAA management have a green-paper feathered nest upon their exit from the agency. That’s the deal. Babbitt’s recent protestations notwithstanding, FAA and Babbitt continue to blame everyone but themselves to deflect and distract attention from their cozy private-dancer status with their true customers the airlines, vendors, and other aeromercs. The American people are sick of it, and applaud the courage of those people and communities who stand up for what is right. Posted By John Tormey III – Pearl River, NY : October 29, 2009 11:51 pm
Hey, Bing. Perhaps they were reading the Bing Blog. The great subject matter and all those witty comments could have kept them busy all the way to London! Posted By Jim, Winston-Salem, NC : October 30, 2009 7:43 am
These poor guys were just multi-tasking. How do you increase productivity and thus GDP at a time of decreased headcount? By getting more work done. How do you get more work done with less people? People have to man-up and do more tasks at the same time. That’s right multi-tasking. Since the government announced positive GDP and thus the end of the recession these men are heros. They have multi-tasked our way out of the recession. When you’re all enjoying your fat bonuses and champaign celebrations raise a glass to the brave multi-taskers and new economy warriors. It’s to them you owe that six figure bonus. Posted By Another Jim, Worcester, MA : October 30, 2009 8:03 am
I used to start playing Doom in the office after work. I would start around six or seven and, next thing you know, it was 2 A.M. Happend all the time. Posted By tony nj : October 30, 2009 9:01 am
The FAA notification problem can be solved with one simple act: dock everyone that shares responsibility for the delayed notification 1 weeks pay, and this will never happen again. Much better way to enforce than hearings, job actions, etc. Simple and immediately effective. Posted By Mitch Szymanski Boylson, MA : October 30, 2009 9:32 am
Force them to accept flight attendant jobs. Posted By Mike Jackson – Austin, Texas : October 30, 2009 9:41 am
It’s time to make Northwest the official airline of America’s CEO’s; same proud modus operandi…’asleep at the wheel’. Posted By Mike, Spokane, WA : October 30, 2009 10:46 am
As a fellow Doomer, I can relate to the missed time, it passes quickly when you are taking down the bad guys. The FAA may have given them a pass if they were on the flight simulator. Perhaps they should have said that the simulator is on level three and they were just about to take the fortress and get to it. Posted By Jack Hammond Canada : October 30, 2009 11:02 am
This snoozing/cruising problem has to be declared a pandemic, at least in the US, worst than the porky flu: -It happened to the Bush administration during the 2nd term. They either fell sleep while piloting or they were just cruisin’ along,, something is happening, might be a virus, it warrants an investigation. Posted By Isaac, Culver City Ca. : October 30, 2009 11:15 am
How about the Qantas pilots who forget to lower the landing gear?! http://www.theaustralian.news.com.au/business/story/0,28124,26302353-23349,00.html Posted By Louise, Sydney Australia : November 3, 2009 8:50 pm
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Stanley Bing
Stanley Bing is a Fortune columnist and best-selling author of business books noted for their wisdom as well as their sharp, slightly acrid sense of humor. He is also the only writer on business and the workplace who still puts on a suit and tie and goes to do battle with the dragons that breathe fire at corporate America every day. This blog captures what remains of his brain after it has exploded in all other directions.
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nowai on the wow dude 2muchlag on wireless