Skip to main content
Galleries Recent Posts Archives
Tags

20 Questions Abraham Lincoln Abuse of Executive Power Abuse of Power Addiction Adult ADD Aggravation Airline Travel Allen & Co. Alzheimer's Amazon american airlines Anna Nicole Smith Annoying Employees AOL Apologies Apple Armageddon Arnold Schwarzenegger Ask Bing Assistants Attila the Hun Augustus bad days Bad puns Bank of America bank write downs Barry Bonds Bear Stearns Bebo beef filets Ben Franklin Bernanke Bert Fingerhut Big Bad Corporations Big Fish Games Bill Gates Bill O'Reilly Bing Awards bing recommends Bing Videos bingstuff Bipolar BlackBerry Bluetooth Bobby Flay body language bogus dudes Bonds Boneheads Bono Book Stores books Booze Booze in First Class Bosses Boy Scouts Brand Loyalty Brazil Brian Greene Britney Britney Spears BS bsjobs Bulls**t Jobs business dinners business ideas Business Language Business Life Business Media Business Stories of the Year business travel Buzzwords Caesar call to action Capitalism Carbon Footprint Careers Celebrity Meltdowns CES Character Character Issue Chauncey Gardiner Cheese balls China Chuck Prince Citibank Citigroup Clone Monkeys Cloud computing cnnmoney Complisults computers Consultants Consumerism Corporate Apologies corporate culture Corporate Retreats Corporate Sanity cost of housing Countrywide coyotes Crazy Bosses crazybosses Creative Capitalism Credit Suisse cubicles Cutbacks Dalai Lama David Beckham Davos Debt Depression Designer Stubble Diabetes Dictator of the Week Diets digital elph Digital solutions to analog problems Dracula Drunken Excess Duke Nukem Dumbest Moments EBay Economic Stimulus Edith Piaf electronic communications Eliot Spitzer Elvis in Business Elvis! Emeril Employee Dementia eOnline Equity Euphemisms Excellence Excessive Exit Packages Executive Compensation Executive Dementia Executricks F. Scott Fitzgerald Fables Facebook Fannie Mae Father's Day Fathers FEMA's response to hurricane Katrina Fidel Castro Financial Times Flight Attendants Foreign Investment Fox News Freddie Mac Fried Chicken Fungibility Game Theory gas prices Gen-X Gen-Y Gen-Zero General Electric George Soros George W. Bush George Washington Getting a raise Global Warming Gluten Good Guys Good News in Bad Times Goofing Off Google Grammar Greed Greenware Grocery Stores Hans Christian Anderson Happy Trends Hardware Stores Harry Potter Harvard Business School Harvard Community Health Plan Health Care Health Plans Heart Disease Heath Ledger Hedge Fund Managers Hedge Funds Heidi Klum Henry Ford heparin Highlights for Children Hitler HMOs Holiday Cheer Holiday Parties Home Depot hot nuts How to Get A Promotion Howard Hughes Human Genome Human Misery IBM Ideas for Warren Buffett Illegal Firing of Attorneys General Immigration Impostors inflation Information in the Digital Realm Insourcing inspirational stories Insurance Companies Interest Rate Cuts Investment Advice Investment Trends IPhone IPod IQ Iran ITunes J.P. Morgan Jack Welch Japanese Corporations Jargon Jerks Jerry Yang JFK John Ford John Keats John Mackey John McCain John Stewart John Wayne Johnny Walker Red Josef Stalin Journalism JP Morgan Chase Karl Rove Kazaa Kenneth Lay King Kong Kurasawa Larry Craig Las Vegas Leonard Cohen Leopard OS Lindsay Lohan LinkedIn litigation London Lord Voldemort Los Angeles Love at the Office Loyalty Lying Mac Air Macadamia Nuts MacBook Air Macbook Pro Machiavelli Macy's malware Marilyn Monroe Marketing Marketing breakthroughs Marketing In Your Face Marvel Comics Massive writedowns Materialism Maxim Magazine Maybach MBIA McKinsey mediabistro.com Meeting Narcolepsy Memorial Day Mergers Merrill Lynch Microsoft Microsoft Outlook Mike the Headless Chicken Misogyny Mitch McConnell MMORPGs Mob Behavior Moguls Monday Morning monetizing celebrity Monster.com Motivational Issues Murphy Bed MySpace Nano Technology Napster Narcissists National Boss's Day Netscape new year's New Year's Resolutions New York Nigeria Nintendo Non-Fungibility Olestra on the road Oprah Organization theory Organizational Life OS X 10.5 OS X Leopard Osama Bin Laden Panic Paris Hilton Peeves Personal Injury Lawyers Personal Integrity Petaluma pets Physician's Desk Reference planes Pogo Poisoned Toothpaste Politics Possible solutions to air travel crises Powerpoint President for Life of Turkmenistan Pretentious Buttheads price of automobiles price of gasoline Price of Oil Productivity Public Disgrace Quality Quizzes Quote of the Day Rabbits on the golf course Rachael Ray Random Acts of Spending Real Estate Values Recession Richard Gere Richard Nixon Rick Wagoner Right brain function RLS Robert Nardelli Robotics Root Canal San Francisco Santa Claus Saparmurat Niyazov 1940 -- 2006 Scary Bosses Scary Trends Second Life Second thoughts Security Analysts Self-Inflicted Injuries Self-Promotion Shakespeare Side Effects Silver Linings Small Pleasures Snail Mail social networking Sony Sony Playstation 3 South Park Sovereign Wealth Funds Stalin Stan O'Neal Stanford Starbuck's Steve Ballmer Steve Jobs Steven Seagal stinky coworker Strategies Stupid Contests Stupid deals Sub-Prime Loans Sudoku Summer Vacation Sun Valley Super Bowl Super Tuesday System Administrators technoid drivel Ted Casablanca TGIF Thanksgiving The 3:10 to Yuma The Black Crowes The Collared Peccary The Dollar The Economist The Euro The Fantastic Four The Fed The Four Seasons The Four Seasons bar The Housing Market The Killer Quotient The New York Times The Oscars The Rudeness Police The Silver Surfer The Stock Market The Tata The Value of Money the War in Iraq Things I Want You To Do Things That Are Gone Tibet Time Warner Time Zone Meltdown TMZ Tom Peters Toyota Prius Trends Trollope Tropical Fish Truth tuna fish Twinkies Uncategorized Uncontrollable Urges United Fruit unwelcome marketing intrusions into daily existence Urban Legends Vacation Value of the Dollar Vampire Zombies Vanity Fair Venture Capitalists Verizon Verne Troyer Virtual Economy Wachovia Wal-Mart Wall Street Walt Kelly War in Iraq Warcraft Warren Buffet Warren Buffett Warren Spector Wealth Web Madness Weird Things We Eat Westinghouse Wetware Wharton What Your Boss Expects of You Whistling past the graveyard Who Is To Blame Whole Foods Wikipedia Woody Allen Work-related injuries Working From Home XBox 360 Yahoo YouTube Zen

comment Email     comment Subscribe

wayne.jpgI just finished watching “She Wore A Yellow Ribbon,” John Ford’s valentine to the U.S. Cavalry. It’s a good movie, not a great one, not the equal of “Stagecoach” or “The Man Who Shot Liberty Valance,” both of which serve less cheese with their meat. I’ve been watching Ford westerns lately because they had an enormous impact on the Japanese samurai movies of the 1950s, which in many ways offer the greatest explorations of corporate life ever, equal to Shakespeare’s plays in their understanding of organizational behavior. Watch Kurasawa’s “Sanjuro” sometime if you want to see what I mean. The last five minutes, in its exquisite mix of swift violence and perfectly replicate at least one Board meeting I recall from the late 1990s.

Be that as it may. In “She Wore A Yellow Ribbon” John Wayne delivers a nugget that precisely mirrors a comment that just came in from Me Again of Seattle, who I’m guessing is writing to me under a fake name, like most of you do. Me Again’s observation was about my thoughts on the subject of John Mackey, the green, leafy head of Whole Foods (WFMI), who was caught pumping his corporate mojo on a chat board under an anagram of his wife’s name. “He should of never apologized for what he did,” writes Mr. or Ms. Again. “If you are going to do something like that, one should never apologize and by doing so is admitting to guilt on something that he shouldn’t have to admit guilt for. We live in a country built on free speech.”

Free speech? Whatever. If anything, the quality of speech on the web goes beyond freedom into license. The real issue in our vast and thorny media culture is the utility of apology. And on that matter, my belief is more clearly set forth by the Duke to a raw recruit: “Never say yer sorry, Mister,” he growls. “It’s a sign of weakness.”

We live in an culture of apology. Apology, sometimes tearful, sometimes not, followed by rehab of some kind, usually, or a highly publicized prison stay, and after that a certain pleasant amnesia as we all turn our attention to new miscreancies we can feast on. At times, these apologies are enough, and many naughty boys and girls are reinstated, if we like them, or they are pretty, or good enough copy. That’s the way it’s supposed to work, anyway.

More often these days, though, the reward for apology seems to be a higher level of punishment for he or she who shows a pink, tender underside to the beast. The cycle has shifted. Apologies seem to enrage the creature, not mollify it, until the sorry apologizer spirals down into the doom that his or her weakness virtually demanded.

The big maw isn’t satisfied by a simple “I’m sorry” anymore. Perhaps only the kind of apology that will be accepted at this point is the samurai version explored in the classic Japanese movies I love, where all the blood is black on white, the moment when the hero or villain, in recognition of fate or his own misdeeds, quite literally falls on his sword and reels back into good grace with his guts falling out all over his hands. Whoops! Ouch. All is well.

Those who don’t apologize do better, I think, all things considered. Two individuals come to mind who might have apologized if they listened to the wrong advisers. The first is Barry Bonds. He’s the only player who has suffered under intense scrutiny on the use of performance enhancing drugs and did not buckle. All the others who have, who stepped forward, talked with Congress, the press, their mommies? All toast. Did they in any way benefit from having unburdened themselves? They did not. And then there’s our Commander in Chief. Many might say that in the course of his Presidency, he may have done some things for which he might have apologized. Katrina. WMDs. That kind of thing. But has he ever offered even the slightest sigh of remorse? Nope. And you know what? I think it’s working for him. In 20 years, I expect to see history books that bear no resemblance to my perception of what’s going on right now… because nobody has apologized for anything so far, and created that record.

I’m going to suggest that everybody who lives in the line of fire consider this strategy real serious, like. “Never say yer sorry, mister,” no matter what stupid thing you’ve gotten yourself into. “It’s a sign of weakness.”

And weakness, my friends, is the one sin we just can’t seem to forgive.

I’m pretty new at this blogging thing and it’s clear to me, even as a newbie, that some blogs get noticed and some just sort of lie there on their backs, peeing like babies on a changing table into the brisk digital wind.

The ones that really punch through are those that employ tags that pop up later on the important search engines like Google, Yahoo, and AOL.  You know about tags. Look at the top of this page and you’ll see a bunch of them.

If you choose your tags right, everybody pretty much in perpetuity who searches for that word or phrase just might end up being directed to the entity that generated the tag that contained it. Hence this posting, in which I will now attempt to drive traffic to this site by indiscriminately tagging a host of words that might serve that purpose.  Linking doesn’t hurt either. But it’s not as good as tagging. So I’ll do both.

A friend of mine who also has a blog notices that when she posted an item about a gluten-free diet, for instance, she was suddenly hit by a bunch of people who are interested in the subject. Diets in general get a lot of action every day on the web, as does anybody who has anything to do with food, including Rachael Ray, Bobby Flay, Emeril, like that.

Food is very closely aligned to health, of course, since we are what we eat. That’s why topics like heart disease, diabetesAddison’s Disease (which struck President John F. Kennedy, who was rumored to have been involved with Marilyn Monroe), arthritis, Alzheimers, among many ailments, are of interest to people, who look up the subject on a variety of sites like the always-excellent Wikipedia and those more specialized.

Of course, the tags that have the highest potential are the ones that involve the celebrity names in just about every field that people want to know about, from the Dalai Lama, who dominates the spirituality game right now (along with his friends and competitive acolytes Steven Seagal and Richard Gere), to Oprah (both as an entertainer and as a force for good), all the way to the celebu-tarts who get more column inches than the War in Iraq (or Operation Iraqi Freedom as it’s still known known by the Multi-National Force and some of the media). You know who I’m talking about, right? Paris! Britney! Lindsay! People go for this sort of thing to sizzling hot aggregator-gossips like tmz and eOnline, where Ted Casablanca continues to report without fear or favor. 

There are so many more! Elvis! Shakespeare! Arnold! Al Gore! Warren Buffett! Barry Bonds! Hitler! Stalin! Bono!

That’s enough for now. If you found your way to this site because you followed any of these tags here — welcome! Take a look around! Hope you find us sticky!


A reader from California writes...
My boss called me 12 times during the 2 hour period when my wife was delivering our first baby. In the 12th call he told me that I should be courteous enough to pick up the phone even though I was in the operating theater. I made one call to him after my baby was born and I could just see his face as I responded with one line: I quit. I got another job in about a week. Read more crazy boss stories.
Stanley Bing
Stanley Bing is a Fortune columnist and best-selling author of business books noted for their wisdom as well as their sharp, slightly acrid sense of humor. He is also the only writer on business and the workplace who still puts on a suit and tie and goes to do battle with the dragons that breathe fire at corporate America every day. This blog captures what remains of his brain after it has exploded in all other directions.